Tag: Expectations

How Guilt & Shame Block Success and My Way Past the Road Block

I am having a complicated day.  I had a work misunderstanding and it has ended up costing me money, which in turn makes me feel totally guilty, like I messed up big time, and now I’m a failure. 

In an attempt to re-frame, I could also say that I learned an important lesson, I won’t make that mistake again, and I’ve been offered a way to re-coop some of the lost dollars.  That should make me feel better, right?  It doesn’t.

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How I Choose Beauty While Accepting Chaos

I take these steps bravely, with enthusiasm, and with the belief that there is a positive future ahead.  I’m not crying in my coffee every morning at all.  In many ways, I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.  (Which may or may not be totally fucked up, but hey, I’ve never really done things in the “right” way or order, so it kind of makes sense.)

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How Do We Transition Along with this Crazy Ass World?

We have to accept what life throws at us and simply deal with the onslaught.  We have to face the fact that the world is in a moment of transition, we are not in control, that we have weaknesses and it is not ok to sweep those weaknesses under the carpet just because we don’t want to look at them. 

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How Going with the Flow Tames the Chaos

I’m choosing now.  I’m choosing happy.  I’m choosing the path of least resistance.  And want to know a secret?  We can all make this choice.  It may seem scary and it may not look how we think we want it to look, but then that’s the point, isn’t it?

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How Getting Lost in Gratitude Shows Me the Way

I’m grateful for the practice, the work, the seeking and the finding.  It’s all part of a process called growth.  After all, it is Spring and I am a wild flower.

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5 Pieces of Advice for My Daughter That Are Also Pertinent to Adulting

It’s simple.  Eat the ice cream. Learn to play the drums. Choose a college in Hawaii for no other reason than it’s in Hawaii. Don’t worry about what you look like when you dance.  Smile and laugh whenever possible.  When someone accuses you of not taking life seriously enough, reply, “Thank goodness.”

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How Faith is a Path Towards Flow and Away from Fear

I chose to change my way of thinking, and do more of the things that I love for no other reason than that is what feels good.  It may seem silly and perhaps a bit naïve, but I was testing a theory that by flowing with the things that are placed in front of me, by following the signs that I usually pass daily without much notice, I would grow not only in my personal life, but in my art as well. 

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How Art Helps Me Manage Unrealistic Expectations

Through the practice of Abstract Expressionism, my inner control freak has loosened her grip on my life and my loved ones.

Thank you to TinyBuddha.com for publishing my article titled How Expectations Can Drive People Away and How to Let Go of Control.

I once was my own worst enemy when it came to being fixated on outcomes.  Being so focused on what I thought "should" happen all the time led to constant disappointment and a feeling of isolation.  Through the practice of my art I have found that stress truly is optional.  

Once again, I am completely humbled by the response to my writing. I have received emails, DMs and comments from people who know and struggle with the constant disappointment of expectations never being met.   Please take a read, and if it resonates with you, feel free to share.  

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