I have a list of things to do. Ok...that's a lie. I have five lists of things to do. I am excellent at making lists. I make a list and then divide those list items into their own sub-lists. When I finish something that wasn't on the original list, I add it and simultaneously put a check mark by it. I have a "master" to do list, then my daily to do list, which I make each morning organized into quadrants. I am a huge dork.
Two weeks ago, I shared my biggest secret with the world, and a change has occurred within me. I feel different. I look in the mirror and I look different to myself. I'm not sure I can give this change a name, but I can give you a few examples of what's happening:
My blog post, I Was A Promiscuous Teen: An Open Letter to All the Men from My Past (see below) has gone viral, and the response has been intense. We need to keep talking, sharing our secrets and burdens. I truly feel as though I have reclaimed my heart and my power, and I no longer feel terrified of this part of my past.
The adventure of becoming a West Coast Abstract Artist, has led me closer to finding my Ikigai. I have seen a few things pretty clearly over the past couple of weeks and I’m now aware of what I DO NOT want to see happen. I do not plan on being surprised by my negative thinking habits and the confusion that it can cause so here, in no particular order, are some changes that are going to be implemented immediately:
Illness, death and injury can be seen as HUGE diversions from the things we should be doing. I challenge that and suggest that perhaps being of service when our family, friends and community needs us does more good than harm. Service feeds the soul.
I am an extremely sensitive artist type person. Fear, anxiety and self doubt can cause stagnation in my abstract art practice, and life in general.
But thankfully, I have found tools to help get past these times of sluggishness. One of these tools is surfing. There is nothing that puts me in the moment and shows me my place within the universe quite like being in the waves.
Thank you to TinyBuddha.com for publishing yet another one of my essays, How Surfing Helped Me Turn My Fear and Anxiety into Confidence. Take a read and comment below and/or share if it resonates with you.
Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone! Don't forget to get outside and play after all that turkey and pie!
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